The Universe Conspires

One of my favorite books is The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. In it, Santiago is driven to pursue his personal legend. He faces obstacles and diversions to achieving his personal legend, but one of the quotes from the book that I like to ponder is: 

quote-Paulo-Coelho-when-you-want-something-all-the-universe-6470

In the book, this help comes in the form of coincidences. Well, today I had one of those.

And, if not a coincidence, at least an unexpected occurrence that is helping me achieve my goals.

After posting my earlier post, my mom contacted me. She said she might be able to help me out with my tuition. I hadn’t wanted to ask her for the money, since the sum of money was rather large. I was also devising a plan that would make things Ok. But she was willing and able, and she offered.

I’m extremely grateful for this short-term, parental loan, though it is always humbling to have to approach the almighty Bank of Mom, especially when you are in your 30s. But she is saving me a couple hundred bucks in late fees in loaning me the money, which is a huge load off of my mind.

I wanted to share this after-story for two reasons:

  1. This has been a lesson in asking for help when you need it. I continue to be pretty terrible at this, though I’m still better than I used to be. I feel embarrassed to have to ask to borrow money, and doing so makes me feel extremely vulnerable. But sometimes I need help, and there are those who care for me who want to help when they can. I would help them if I could! Why is it different? 
  2. This has been a lesson in vulnerability. It may be a surprise, but I felt vulnerable when I published that earlier blog post. Some of the details of my situation don’t feel very flattering, but I still wanted to share them because I know that others feel the same shame and embarrassment about money stuff that I do. Yet, when I expressed my vulnerability, someone reached out to me offering their help. If I had struggled in silence, no one would have known, and I would have been alone in my struggle. That’s not what happened here. Though it felt awkward to share, I did, and I received help that I wasn’t even expecting.

So, I’m feeling extremely grateful for the help I’ve received.

I’m going to express my gratitude on the tango dance floor! I’ll have to remember to breathe there too…

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