You Have to Live It

life-can-only-be-understood-backward-but-it-must-be-lived-forward-47Last weekend, someone asked me how my week was going to be.

An innocent enough question.

But it pissed me off.

My initial impulse was to answer “good.” I’m a pretty happy person nowadays. I like my job. I enjoy my after-work activities (lately watching Star Trek: Next Generation and writing or crafting). Why wouldn’t it be good?

Then annoyance kicked in.

How the hell do I know? I thought last week would be good, and then my cousin was killed in a triple homicide.

Kind of took the shine off of the week.

Then a more stable thought entered. 

The great thing about life is you have to live it.

I don’t want to postulate how my week will go. I want to live it. I want to give it a push towards happiness and positivity. But if something happens that makes me feel some of the less desirable emotions, I want to give those experiences space too.

I want to live life. All of it.

I realize that I might have been testy because I’m still grieving. That question brought up in the impermanence of life and a reminder that I and/or any of my loved ones might not be here tomorrow. But even when those losses occur, my week will be.

Being is a pretty terrific state, even with the painful moments.

I’ll take away Shakespeare’s debate, and I’ll say: to be is the only way.

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